THERE’LL BE SOME CHANGES MADE

Recently, I received an e-mail message from an amateur drama group who had been poring over one of my scripts for some 16 weeks. They informed me they “…really liked it…” , and loved “… all sorts of ingredients such as the drum use so carefully set out…”. They had apparently “… steered away from drum use… over the years, but this could be a turning point.”. The outcome was that they would “…very much like to proceed…” with the script. However, they had “…two requests…”

One was to “…import one or two routines…” (My italics!) The second was to expand the chorus involvement to accommodate a group of children, the bulk of which were of primary school age, to give them “… one or two lines each…”

I replied, thanking them for asking about the possibility of making alterations, pointing out that this was the exception rather than the rule, and informed them that if they let me know specifically what they had in mind, I would certainly have a look at modifying the script.

This has happened before, and on occasions, I have supplied alternative bits of dialogue and business, so that societies could pick and choose, and combine them in any number or order to cover their requirements.

In this case, I received a reply from the Director, informing me that the group liked my script very much, but felt that they needed “…the flexibility to make changes “… as and when the need arises, and not have to seek approval of each change…” (My italics!)

I was also informed that “… late in the day, there can be the need for changes to accommodate a local or national topic of interest…” (My italics!)

The Director claimed that they had already presented 16 pantomimes, and “…have not had any issues with writers…”

To begin at the beginning…

The script I supplied to the group has, like all my scripts, a title page, on the reverse of which there is a heading in bold caps, ‘IMPORTANT NOTES – PLEASE READ CAREFULLY’. Note 5 reads, “No alteration to the title or script should be made without the author’s consent. All approved alterations of or suggestions for the script become the authors’ property.”

I can insist that this rule is adhered to, but in practice I have evidence that it is often completely ignored. Unless I attended every performance of my pantomimes, I have no way of knowing what alterations are made to the scripts, either during rehearsals, or on the 'spur of the moment' during a show, and the more 'cavalier' companies know this.

The fact that the Director in question referred to the local and national topics of interest, and the 16 pantomimes, suggests to me that this desire to alter scripts wasn’t a new one, so, a simple question… why didn’t the group ask about the procedure regarding script changes when they made their request for a reading copy? It would have been courteous, and it might have saved both parties considerable time and trouble.

Seeing as I wasn’t contacted about this issue immediately the group received the script, containing Note 5 above, did no one bother to read the notes, did someone read the notes and just ignore them, or did they read the notes and think that they were exempt?

In a previous blog, I said my piece about ad-libbing, but here, this is about someone wanting to make alterations to the script, without seeking the writer’s approval, even though he has offered to do the job for them.

What’s this, “…late in the day, there can be the need for changes to accommodate a local or national topic of interest…” nonsense? There is no need to include local or topical references at all.

Of course the defence of this need is that this is what audiences want. My belief, for what it is worth, is that if an amateur society manages to present a pantomime with good acting, dancing and singing, tuneful music and appropriate sound effects, well-designed sets, props and costumes, good quality sound and lighting, comfortable seating, with a good view of the stage, and they serve a decent cup of tea during the interval, then not one single member of the audience will leave the theatre complaining that the show was short on local or topical references. In fact, I guarantee it. I also guarantee that every society is going to fall well short on many of the requirements listed above. Even if they reach a high standard on all these aspects, they should be aware that however well you do a show, you can always do it better! A lorry-load of local and topical references will not rescue a poor production.

Personally, I would put drum cues well before topical references. Remember, this group had “… steered away from drum use… over the years...". More about the crash, bang, wallop later. Watch this space!

Some amateur operatic societies feel that it's imperative they include local or topical references in their pantomimes, but wouldn't dream of inserting them in a production of 'The King And I'! Is a puzzlement!

The outcome of the saga detailed above was that we both decided to go our separate ways.

To quote the great Billy Wilder again… “I have ten commandments. The first nine are, thou shalt not bore. The tenth is, thou shalt have right of final cut.”


CLASS ACT #3

In the light of the preceding grump, I decided to include the above.

Brassy, gangly, Cass Daley (born Catherine Dailey), (July 17, 1915 - March 22, 1975) was an American radio, television and film actress, singer, and comedienne. She started her career as a band vocalist, but was upstaged during one of her singing performances by a buffoonish emcee by the name of Red Skelton, and was inspired to switch to playing for laughs.

Some of her songs recorded for Decca Records include: "Abba Dabba Honeymoon", "Put the Blame on Mame" and "A Good Man Is Hard to Find".

Her eccentric, off-the-wall singing and dancing combined with her gawky, buck-toothed appearance endeared her to movie audiences in the 1940s and 1950s, most notably in knockabout comedies. 

I suppose you might describe this performance as… “Giving it some oomph!”

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No strings attached!

I receive lots of correspondence from amateur drama/operatic societies, and it amazes me why so many don’t appear to have letter headings. I get notes written on the back of envelopes, bits of cardboard, and sheets from those wire-bound reporters’ notebooks, with the torn perforations still at the top.

So G. Wizz is offering to design, a letter heading, free, gratis and for nothing, for any bona fide drama/operatic group. Really!

Just send me an e-mail message and we’ll take it from there… as opposed to ‘Take It From Here’, which was a BBC radio comedy programme, broadcast between 1948 and 1960.

Written by Frank Muir and Denis Norden, it originally starred Jimmy Edwards, Dick Bentley and Joy Nichols, and later, June Whitfield and Alma Cogan. The show is perhaps most famous for introducing ‘The Glums’… "Oh really, Ron, do you expect me to just sit here, like a lemon?", to which the dim Ron responds "No thanks Eth, I've just had a banana." Think about it!

Hurry, hurry, hurry!