HOW LONG?

I am often asked to give a running time for a particular script of mine. My answer is as follows:

All my pantomimes are what could be described as 'full length'. I try to write them so that they can be performed in around 2 hours, including a 15 minute interval. The format is to have the second half slightly shorter that the first half.

Of course, the running time can depend on a number of factors which are completely beyond my control.

Length of Overture.
The overture is not essential, although it can be a useful device for allowing a few moments for the audience to settle down. I went to see a production of my script for 'Aladdin' once, where a very competent musical quartet played an overture that lasted around five minutes. It was very well executed, but far too long.

The pace of playing.

I am of the opinion that pantomime ought to be played at a fast pace, wherever possible. It does actually lend itself to this approach, as lines can be delivered out front from a static stance (see below), and many of them can be proclaimed. This helps set up the lines that might benefit from a slower delivery for dramatic or comedic purposes.

One way to ensure that the pace is maintained is to insist that the actors are conversant with their lines, so that they can not only deliver them with pace, but pick up on cues quickly. This can of course, be very difficult to put into practice with amateur actors.

Moving around the stage without any real purpose can affect the pace of playing, and I am a firm believer that movement should be kept to a minimum. The Dame can assume an appropriate posture, and simply by adjusting the position of her arms, dominate the stage. Unfortunately, many amateur actors have 'hot feet' and find it very difficult to stand still on stage. My advice is, only move if there is a reason for it.

The golden rules are:

Play it big, out front.

Every move should have motivation.

Don't turn your back on the audience.

Smile.

Stand still as much as possible. This makes the comedy moves funnier.

The duration of the musical numbers.

Another of my beliefs is that musical numbers should be short and sweet. It does seem strange that the poorer the singing or dancing, the longer the musical numbers last – or does it just seem like that?

Ad-libbing.

Ad-libbing actors in pantomimes are my bêtes-noires. In Simon Louvish's excellent book, 'Monkey Business. The Lives And Legends Of The Marx Brothers' (Faber and Faber - 1999), the author writes, "... the grand old image persists: the Marx Brothers as complete lunatics, uncontrollable loons who did what they wanted on screen, to the despair of colleagues, crew and producers... but… the Marx Brothers were nothing if not professionals, paying the most serious attention to their craft, worrying endlessly about lines and gags, working to perfect their art, and then to disguise all that hard work, as all best artists do, under the veneer of spontaneous ease." If only!

Ad-libbing slows down a production and winds me up!

I am not against amateur actors by the way, I just happen to think that sometimes they use the fact that they are amateurs as an excuse for not doing something that they should be able to do, paid or not. Over the years, I have been in quite a few shows with some very talented amateur actors, and I have also appeared in productions with professional actors who acted more off stage than they did on.

CLASS ACT #15

Milton Berle (1908 – 2002) was an American comedian and actor. His career as an entertainer spanned over 80 years.

In 1914 he appeared in the film ‘Bunny’s Little Brother’, and took the stage on Broadway in 1920 as one of a baby sextette for a revival of the musical comedy, ‘Floradora. He later went into radio and television. As the host of NBC’s ‘Texaco Star Theatre’ (1948-55), he was the first major American television star and was known to millions of viewers as "Uncle Miltie" and "Mr. Television".

Many in the industry credited Berle with television's success in the U.S.A., because he was able to attract major sponsors. Some even felt he was responsible for selling television sets. Within one season the number of sets in the country increased from 500,000 to one million.

He pirated other comedians' material so shamelessly that he was dubbed "The Thief of Badgags". In his defence he stated that he “…never stole a joke in my life. I just find them before they’re lost.”

He also said, “If you don’t have a directional point of view or a style, you’d better toss out what you’ve got and find yourself.”… good advice.

Also… “Funny is funny. Nothing’s old if you haven’t heard it before and nothing’s new if you have.” That’s my kind of quote!

The teeterboard routine is simple  and it's silly, but notice how the performers don't try and add their own contributions. Nobody wants to hog the show. When Mitlon Berle indicates that the 'sofa' should be relocated he does it with small movements of the hand, but there are so many small movements that the "sofa" ends up off the stage. Collapse of stout party! Subtleties can work in comedy.

HAPPY BEARTHDAY

The famous, fuzzy, and funny Sooty, turned 70 two days ago.

It all started when Harry Corbett bought a bear glove puppet on Blackpool's North Pier in 1948 to entertain his children, on a family holiday blighted by bloomin’ awful British weather.

Sooty became a star… and he still is. He has hardly been off the television screen, and he has appeared on stage too, in pantomimes and Christmas shows for decades. Long may he continue.

I saw Harry and Sooty at Dewsbury Town Hall, way back yesteryonder. They were funderful.

According to the BBC… who introduced Sooty to the television public in ‘Talent Night’ on Saturday 3 May, 1952… “Richard Cadell, who has been keeping Sooty in check since 1998, said it was "an amazing achievement that Sooty is so popular after 70 years". But for him, the "secret is absolutely the simplicity of it all - everybody knows The Sooty Show".”

Basil Brush came into being in 1962 and 2018 celebrates the 50th anniversary of the start of his Basil Brush Show. No… I am not going to say, “Boom… boom!” Ooops… I just did!

So you see… if it’s good it doesn’t date… Punch and Judy, Laurel and Hardy, The Marx Brothers, Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, the Beatles…